A tale of transition to the Great lord of Poon

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A tale of transition to the Great lord of Poon

Post by The Great Lord of Poon on Tue Mar 12, 2013 11:00 pm

I'm not much of a one for flashy introductions; so let me get down to my story right away. Late one night, after I had finished work, I went for a walk in a field near my apartment, as I'm prone to do. I like to walk about in the brisk night air and watch the skies. I had always wondered what was up there, but I wasn't likely to find out. I was always chubby as a kid, and even now I wasn't very thin, though I wouldn't call myself fat. I wore glasses and had been made fun of my whole life for being a nerd, I hadn't even had sex. Living as I did, I always longed for the sky. I wanted to be taken away from this world, to go to a place where I would be accepted, I don't know if it was my desperate longing, or just random luck, but that night I was.

I was lying on my back in the wet grass, looking up at the sky, twinkling with the light of a hundred thousand stars. I idly let my eyes follow a slow moving light far above me. I decided that it was an airplane, and didn't give it much thought, but as I continued to watch, it halted its linear progression directly above me and began to slowly grow as it got closer. For a moment I considered the possibility that it might fall on top of me, but it was moving far to slowly. Before I knew what was happening, a large metallic disk was floating just above me. From the center of the object came a blinding white light, and then everything went dark.

The next thing I knew I was lying naked in an open white leather pod. I wasn't cold or warm, the atmosphere seemed to be the perfect temperature. I sat up with a shock and looked at my surroundings. A circular light was illuminating my pod, and all around me were trays filled with unrecognizable objects. What caught my attention the most, however, were the several blue women mulling about. One of them glanced over and saw that I was up.

"Oh, good, you're awake," she said as she approached me. She was wearing a once piece robe that started just below her breasts and fell to the floor, two triangles extended from the robe to cover the front of her breasts, but not much was left to the imagination. After I had gotten over my initial shock, I noticed that she was strikingly beautiful, in fact all the women around me were. Her breasts were enormous and firm. She had a youthful and firm face, her entire body just screamed "feminine".

"Um, yes, I am awake. And might I ask, what the hell?" It was the only response I could think of.

"Ah yes, you must be terribly confused. I've prepared a rather lengthy explanation for you, would you like to hear it?" she answered.

"Yes, yes I would.".............
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Re: A tale of transition to the Great lord of Poon

Post by Ephemeral on Tue Mar 12, 2013 11:16 pm

WHAT?! You're just going to leave it THERE?!

I WANNA KNOW MORE!

(Oh, and welcome, by the way.)
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Re: A tale of transition to the Great lord of Poon

Post by The Doctor on Tue Mar 12, 2013 11:20 pm

MOAR MOAR MOAR.

You dont stop rowing a boat in the middle of a lake without good reason, neither should you stop telling that story.

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Re: A tale of transition to the Great lord of Poon

Post by SJFaerlind on Tue Mar 12, 2013 11:55 pm

*leaves bras for the blue ladies*
Sounds like they probably need these.......
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Re: A tale of transition to the Great lord of Poon

Post by Ephemeral on Wed Mar 13, 2013 2:01 am

PAH! Bras are for sissies! Cool
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Re: A tale of transition to the Great lord of Poon

Post by The Great Lord of Poon on Wed Mar 13, 2013 3:03 am

"Very well," then she began her speech "we are the Caalin, and we greatly desire your help. You have been chosen because you are uniquely capable of handling these sorts of situations. You understand that aliens will be extremely different, and you are docile enough to agree to what we have to ask of you.

"Our species is a... disappointing one. Our males have terribly small genitalia, usually only an inch in length, and have almost no desire for sex. Our females, on the other hand, have a ravenous desire for sex, and one inch isn't nearly enough. We are an incredibly advanced society, so we could enhance our males, but they are plainly unwilling, so we have to turn to other means for our sexual stimulation. Masturbation and Homosexuality is horribly taboo in our culture, so we cannot pleasure ourselves. This is where you come in. The building that you are in now is the 'exotic pleasures' company headquarters. We deal entirely with sexual pleasure, and we would like you to be our Great Lord of Poon. Your primarily function would be to satisfy us"

At this point I tried to protest, but this blue woman wasn't done yet.

"Hold on, let me continue. You won't have to worry about getting an ugly customer. As I've said, our society is very advanced, so no one is ever ugly. Genetic enhancements and surgery have purged our society of undesirable people.
But before you say anything, there is something that you must know." With that she reached back and undid her robe, letting it fall to the floor. The first thing I noticed was that her large blue breasts hardly sagged at all, but then I looked further down. Between her legs dangled a massive, oddly shaped penis.

"You're a dude?!" I blurted out.

"Oh, no. I am fully female. Somewhere far back in our evolutionary history our species were hermaphroditic, but then males evolved. Our penises just never went away. They are no use for reproduction." The woman moved her penis out of the way to show me the vagina residing beneath.

"Why are you all humanoid?" I asked, stalling for time "I always thought that aliens would be vastly different from humans."

"You're usually correct, but this was just luck I guess. We know of thousands of other species, and most of them are radically different, but we chose you because you match our physiology so well. It really couldn't work any other way."

As much as I didn't want to admit it; This alien man/woman turned me on massively.
The offer of being a supreme planetary love machine was a uplifting thought.

"Well, will you join us or not?" The alien woman pressured......
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Re: A tale of transition to the Great lord of Poon

Post by JNK on Wed Mar 13, 2013 8:20 am

^ now that dude can write!!!

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Re: A tale of transition to the Great lord of Poon

Post by The Doctor on Wed Mar 13, 2013 9:14 am

WE HAVE AN AUTHOR IN OUR MIDST! GRAB HIM BEFORE HE LEAVES!

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Re: A tale of transition to the Great lord of Poon

Post by Ephemeral on Wed Mar 13, 2013 11:41 am

Well, that took an unexpected turn! Shocked
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Re: A tale of transition to the Great lord of Poon

Post by JNK on Wed Mar 13, 2013 11:52 am

is it Tur or Greybeard? or someone else?

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Re: A tale of transition to the Great lord of Poon

Post by olivia_the_vulcan on Wed Mar 13, 2013 1:24 pm

watdidijustread


And welcome!

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Re: A tale of transition to the Great lord of Poon

Post by The Doctor on Wed Mar 13, 2013 7:32 pm

WELCOME WELCOME WELCOME

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Re: A tale of transition to the Great lord of Poon

Post by JNK on Thu Mar 14, 2013 9:05 am

can we find out who is that, plz?

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Re: A tale of transition to the Great lord of Poon

Post by The Great Lord of Poon on Thu Mar 14, 2013 10:07 pm

"I will," I said cautiously. I was so nervous, but this was finally my chance to be a part of something new and to transcend to the realms of the lovegods.

"We knew you would," she said, gathering the other aliens around my pod "We've already taken the liberty of altering you slightly."

"'Altering' me?" I asked, a little worried.

"Nothing you wouldn't agree with. We merely increased your stamina and vitality, got rid of your gag reflex, rearranged your internal workings, reduced the time lag between orgasms, increased the volume of your ejaculations rather considerably, and shaved your anus."

None of their changes were particularly objectionable to me, but one I couldn't quite figure out, "You rearranged my intestines?"

"Yes, have you seen my phallus? Our woman will likely want to use these on you, and we are far to large for your previous anatomy. We only enhanced you."

It all made sense, but scared me a little. Flaccid this woman's penis was larger than mine when fully erect, I wasn't sure that I wanted to go down this route , but she reassured me that it would be alright.

"Now that you're awake and you've decided to join us, all we have to do is make sure that the corrections were successful, and you can go to work"......
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Re: A tale of transition to the Great lord of Poon

Post by SJFaerlind on Thu Mar 14, 2013 11:02 pm

I'm guessing it's Sparrow under a second username.....?
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Re: A tale of transition to the Great lord of Poon

Post by Crouton on Thu Mar 14, 2013 11:10 pm

Well that's one way to introduce yourself. What makes you think Sparrow SJ?
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Re: A tale of transition to the Great lord of Poon

Post by SJFaerlind on Thu Mar 14, 2013 11:15 pm

Just a hunch...
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Re: A tale of transition to the Great lord of Poon

Post by Klingon on Fri Mar 15, 2013 9:38 am

but there is member sparrow33 or I miss something again
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Re: A tale of transition to the Great lord of Poon

Post by The Doctor on Fri Mar 15, 2013 10:13 am

That's who they're talking about... Sparrow..

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Re: A tale of transition to the Great lord of Poon

Post by The Great Lord of Poon on Mon Mar 18, 2013 11:37 pm

I am not the sparrow that you speak off. I am an intergalactic love machine, that writes of his adventure whilst on the eternal quest for the ultimate source of passion.
Shall I continue my story, or is it too raunchy for you mere mortals?
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Re: A tale of transition to the Great lord of Poon

Post by JNK on Tue Mar 19, 2013 9:56 am

well I'm definitely not a mere mortal....

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Re: A tale of transition to the Great lord of Poon

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